4:02 am and I'm still contemplating whether or not the decision I made was the correct one. It's like in life that's all it ever is, just a constant question mark and for once I just want the right thing laid out for me to read. One thing that wont leave my mind is ... when or ... "WHAT IF" I stupidly, unknowingly pushed true love away. Yet I cant get over how painful this is, how undeniably heart aching it was to be slapped in the face not once or twice but numerous times by his own FRIENDS. All I've ever done was try to be the best for this one dude, the one guy who made me feel some sort of emotion that could never be matched. For once an off the rector scale especially of my standards.
Reality just struck me thanks to an amazing friend, he could've said the usual and told me I deserved better instead he told me he knew a good guy when he saw one ... the last person I would ever suspected to defend him was the one who made me realize that I was nothing without him*.
"Truth is, everybody is going to hurt you, you just gotta figure out who’s worth suffering for." -Bob Marley
OMG, I'm so stupid I let love in and pushed him away. Everything that I was ever raised to know was put to the test and I failed miserably.
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